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Showing posts from June, 2021

The Rapist's 'Conscience'

As her thick and dark skin continued absorbing the sun’s rays and its heat, she began to have arousing flashbacks of her sexual satisfaction which was now ordeal trauma for her rape victim. She looked at her reflection in the rearview mirror of her car and attempted to look within herself but unfortunately, her thick dark skin was a barrier as always. Did she rape someone? No, she used financial coercion for sexual pleasure therefore it could not be sexual coercion even though there was no consent. She questioned herself and her own human nature whereby her human nature had become her, “Why do you desire sexual coercion over sexual consent? You could have the latter than the former.” For if you had a woman’s true beauty with no complex inferiority you would have never had the human nature you have now to use financial muscle to aid coercion for sexual pleasure. Beauty lies in the hands of the beholder, but your beauty makes the beholder contemplate if he or she is lying to himself or h

Situational Homosexual

  He felt like a stranger to himself yet he did not even know who he was nor what he was before he began to feel like a stranger to himself. Profusely he began to scratch his skin trying to peel off the scent of his homosexual act that had chemically and spiritually attached itself to his physical being which could not be separated from him for it had become him and he became it which was beyond matrimony union. Happy however in doubt if he became happy the conscious way. He had been raped by his liberal mentality. A messiah who is a sinner is what he was. He felt like a stranger to himself yet he did not even know who he was nor what he was before he began to feel like a stranger to himself.   He had done something he never had a negative view about psychologically but had a disdain for physically. He looked at himself in a shattered glass bottle and was bleak to his own reflection though the disgust within him was evident. He wanted to vomit himself out yet he needed to keep ingest

More Darkness Than Light

He peddled himself with anger that was motivated by frustration which was fueled by depression and induced by trauma that was manifesting into tremors. Had he been obedient when he was supposed to rebel for his own righteousness? There was an unstable miscommunication between the brain and the body but his consciousness was systematically functioning, for his conscience became more logical than the brain, “The light that you have inside of you is making you a featherweight than a lightweight in this world whereby you need more darkness inside of you than light. For the stronger you become with light inside of you, the more the strength burdens you, for you are too light to carry that strength and you cannot absorb more of that strength into you for it will devour you from within and exploit you instead of you ‘abusing’ it. You have more light inside of you that has blinded you which you’re now using to seek darkness so that the darkness cannot only open your eyes but liberate your mind

Financial Idolatry

   Now it has dawned on you that you can live without your GOD but you cannot live nor survive without money because your GOD’s salvation is valueless as compared to the priceless financial freedom and deliverance brought by money. Thank GOD and the Prophet Muhammad that now you have practically learned than theoretically educated that there are no ethics when it comes to making money the same way they are no morals when it comes to poverty.  The god of money is not what you need, the money that makes the god of money is what you desire.  His mind was at ease and probably became stress free yet oddly the guilty conscience began to entice him to a point whereby though his mind was at ease depression was slowly kicking in, in the form of a guilty conscience. He now knew he could survive the night to struggle tomorrow whereby the previous day he had no reassurance that he would persevere during the day to survive the night to struggle tomorrow. His spirit felt disgusted with him instead o

The Adulterer

  I had to satisfy myself with someone’s wife which is adultery yet the satisfaction or pleasure of adultery outweighs the consequences of the sin and the sin itself. For my hunger for satisfaction began to desire any appetite so that it would not become starvation. Hence I realize it was not the fear of committing adultery but the fear of how to become numb and overcome the guilty conscience of adultery. The satisfaction of adultery outweighs the guilty conscience. He staggered himself in the streets as he was being pierced by a guilty conscience from a distance. He knew what he had done was wrong yet satisfactory and fulfilling more than it pleasured him. He arrived at the door of his home then rammed it in and went straight into the bathroom. Filled the bathtub with cold running water till it began to overflow then haphazardly dived into the bathtub fully clothed. His head was a whisker away from going beneath the overflowing water then he became still as the water kept on running

GOD's Protective Hindrance

He became dry after being made to drink the waters of GOD when he was thirsty. GOD was not protecting him from anything but GOD was hindering him from himself to be what he had to be than wanted to be. The protection he had received from GOD plagued him with personal insecurities and wondered if it was protection or hindrance. For the pain he was protected from GOD as he saw it behind his fortress of a prison cell of protection was a pleasure. For with a liberal conscience that is not polarized it is not GOD’s protection he was against it was GOD’s hindrance that he wanted to protect himself from. He cursed at himself as he strolled from the church street to his illustrious shack. Cursing at himself what he wished he could have cursed at GOD but knew that he was doing it indirectly. The Bible that was clutched in between his barren hands he then left it on top of a fertile trash can opposite his neighbor's residence. He breathed widely then with rage exorcised to the Heavens trum

Numb Victory

  He had all the priceless peace which evolved into a deafening silence that began to secretly devour him quietly. The self-sacrifice he made for himself and the servant leadership he served himself with to be a victor did not make him selfish or self-centered, it is what he had to do for himself to not be a victim of other people’s victories. For the spoils of his victory were accepted by his soul but the way he became victorious was despised deeply by his soul yet praised by his human nature that had become his conscience. It dawned on him that the human nature that he had indoctrinated in himself to engineer him for victory did not architecture him for the victims of victory he was to earn and devour than the gains of victory he deserved. The force of human nature has no supernatural powers above it like the ones that enslave the human conscience. He could touch his success but could not feel it. See it before his very eyes yet could not visualize it for it blinded him. He lived w

Own Personal Threat

  You constructed a fortress to protect yourself from the ones you loved, as the fortress grew wider, thicker and taller it slowly, silently then painfully pushed away those whom you had a connection with till you were apart and then separated. For you believed the ones closest to you who were connected to you would hurt you when the one who would excruciate you was closer than them and was inside you who was yourself. You thought you needed some time alone or some ‘me time’ only to your surprise that what you desired was isolation so that you would feel secure from your personal insecurities that you saw come to life in other people, which was false but just fear of being alone and being hurt by those you had a connection with that had plagued your mind. He sat on the perch of his bed and sighed in pain. Pain that was invisible on the outside but was aching in the side. He could walk from one end of his room to another though he was dragging himself internally to have motion. What h

Higher Power

  Do you want to be a slave to a liberal higher power? If you are a slave to a liberal higher power or a slave to an authoritarian higher power you are still a slave. Be a GOD unto yourself, if you fail to be a GOD unto yourself be a higher power unto yourself. The higher power was at the top and you were at the bottom, what satisfied you did not fulfill it due to your different altitudes and you have a human nature then it has a supernatural nature that is not human, therefore it fed you what would satisfy its supernatural nature so that it would remain a higher power unto you whilst you were starved by what you were fed. Finally, you have the grace to become a higher power unto yourself that equates with supernatural nature so do not disgrace the grace you have been anointed with. You are a higher power now so you could do what you desire physically for you no longer have to think what is just for you are a higher power.” His faith was stomped seven-fold by depression whilst his ho

GOD's Way

I feel that GOD’s way is the long route that makes one more hungry than determined and that hunger evolves to starvation, starvation which is then consumed by envy that leads you to desert GOD’s way for what you desire for yourself, for you fear that through GOD’s way, you might get to the destination of what you desire when you are a different person and you are no longer in desire of what you envied due to you no longer being the same person with same the state of mind. The way of GOD stated that “The message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing.”, what about those like me who are perishing whilst consuming the message of the cross in GOD’s way. Whose way have I been doing things? Whose way am I walking on which is full of thorns that pierce my flesh and ignite tremor in my mind? At each destination in this way the journey continues to a new destination with more thistles? Why am I in this way and for what than for who, for what justifies the why? It is more of

Unsatisfactory Vengeance

  It was your conscience that ciphered the logic that you were being hurt and the sensible thing to do was to revenge with no remorse. This in turn made your human nature have a bitter ambition for vengeance and a concentrated passion for hatred. The ‘guilty’ conscience that is piercing you is your mind that is overwhelmed by the satisfaction that your human nature managed to perform beyond logical expectations, therefore it is not unsatisfactory vengeance but it is vengeance that is beyond satisfaction that the human conscience is not factored to absorb because it is highly satisfactory. So it becomes unsatisfactory vengeance which could result in the malfunction of the human conscience. For now, your human nature has become your conscience. She sat on her anointed chair with remorse yet not in grief. She had managed to inflict the pain that was exacted on her sevenfold on those who had hurt and then crucified her. It was a mission accomplished for her though she struggled to accept

Shortfall Redemption

  Tragically he found himself doing it to redeem himself than for the cause. The fulfillment of redemption was swallowed by the craving for the cause. He ironically and with satire began to question himself and his redemption whilst he took a smoke mentally than physically. Was he given a shortcoming opportunity for redemption then came up short of redemption or came up short of redemption after being given a lengthy opportunity that he exposed well but was blind to the exposure for he expected revenge in place of redemption? What he visualized he would feel when he got redeemed was not how he felt when he redeemed himself, and then he tried to dismally adjust the redemption to what he visualized which pushed him into a deep decadence for what he hoped he would feel and what he felt was faithless. Hence he saw the redemption to be shortfall redemption. He attempted to falsely comfort himself whilst the grief of shortfall redemption mourned him to despair. He felt that he had been redee

Premeditated Guilt

  Her conscience rebuked her than counseled her to do the logical thing that would not make her suffer from a guilty conscience, however, her human nature was already mentoring her and then parenting her on how to have premeditated guilt so that she would have no guilty conscience before, during and after committing an offense that would be a crime and a sin simultaneously. “You should be calm before your actions of justification which is what they are and not actions of guilt. For the justification of your actions outweigh the mass of guilty conscience and when it is so the logical thing to do will be to let your conscience go out of both its mind and your mind for the guilty conscience will tip the scale in selfish favor of itself over the justification of your actions. See how your guilty conscience is giving you low self-esteem for you have not thoroughly prepared yourself to have an excellent premeditated guilty conscience, that when the guilty conscience infects you; you will be

From The Corner

  He had begun walking away from the corner but the progress still seemed to be a distance away and it was more comfortable to jog back to the corner than it was to continue progressing towards progress that was a distance away with the distance being uncalculated though the destination was visible in one’s mind yet not in sight. He chose to be a risk taker than to take chances for there were no opportunities for him to take chances and doing what he thought he would never do to stand away from the corner was now a risk. The biggest progress he made was progressing away from the corner than walking away from it. For it is a graceful blessing to have tears of sorrow from pained progress than to have tears of laughter and joy whilst in the corner. He had begun to war with the stereotypes and the stereotypes were battling him back so that he could fight them than war with them. He had already started something and was on his way up probably a start-up but going up was just like ascending