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Showing posts from June, 2018

Selfishness, Despise and Motivation

Am I about to justify my conscience of being self-centered and selfish or I am about to reveal a truth to you that you are not supposed to be aware of? Even if you are aware of it, you pay great ignorance to it. Why? When I passed the beggar on the street this afternoon I did not give in to his pleading for financial assistance even though I could offer him a little assistance which would be something to him. But I chose not to offer that assistance. Earlier this morning on my way to the Central Business District whilst driving my six-seater car, I saw a group of people by the roadside hoping to be picked up and commuted to their different destinations. I could have assisted six to seven of them but I did not do so, I just drove off. A couple of weeks earlier in the rural outskirts, I witnessed the poverty within a small family. I knew, GOD knew and that family knew I could assist them to be above the poverty datum line. As usual, I just did not help even though it was in me. In all th

Comfort Zone:Psychological Prison

I imprison myself in a comfort zone. A psychological comfort zone. I need help. I am hurting myself with the way I think. I am insane within my mind but the way I act and relate to people I am normal. LORD my mind hurts from making myself too comfortable and not acting. As I sit, I start thinking. I get lost in thoughts and imagination of what could be or could have been. I enter a psychological comfort zone where I find myself to be lazy, hardworking, rich, wealthy, impressive or a game changer. Or anything else that comes to mind but in reality, I am not as comfortable in my " psychological comfort zone". Real comfortable within my mind but a danger, a deceit and a tragedy are what it is in reality. This comfort zone of mine. Do I deserve to be comfortable then? Why choose a comfort zone in my mind? Why even choose a comfort zone at all? Shouldn't I be working hard towards being impressive, wealthy, rich, or a game changer than just thinking of it in my mind and lying t

Plotting Against GOD

I am plotting against GOD if a situation does not go the way I intend it to and how GOD said it would. I know that I messed up and only realized it at the end. But I am calm and composed knowing very well that GOD has my back. Am I supposed to be thinking in such a way and putting myself in a comfort zone? Yes, I am. That is the way I was structured to think. I am not to question it. Why? Because GOD offered a comfort zone and I accepted it. Even though I know I have messed up, I'm still fine because I believe GOD has my back. I have given GOD full authority in my life but forgot to give the power and authority to me, the most important entity. I "know" I am going to be delivered from the mess I have made. Is it so? The doubts are resurfacing about the mess I have made. The big screw-up. I am already seeing the results and questioning GOD if he will save me. The odds are stacked against me and if GOD does not deliver me........ I then start plotting against GOD or should

The Writing Of A Psychopath

Dear reader, what you are about to read is the work of a psychopath. So please bear with me. For I put my best effort to join the pieces of this puzzle that gave no expected results. It was the wish of the psychopath for you to read it.  THANK   YOU . I am a top-class psychopath.  Can  the psychologist and the therapist treat me? I wonder? If they cannot help me, can you help me? I am "me " or a psychopath as I would like to call myself in line with society. What do I mean? I overthink about " what could have been only if I had .....and what I could be only if I can or such would happen in a way ." I am not crazy. I am not sick in the mind. I am not a danger to society. I am not a psychopath or a retard. You are crazy. You are sick in the mind. You are a danger to me for allowing them to keep me in a cage. I tend to think more about the past now. It has become a daily habit. I am not content with my current state of life, even though it's moving on, I still thin

The Promised Land?

Who paints a portrait of reality and does not seek to gain from it? The preacher during the sermon said that "If we abide by the word we will be delivered to the promised land. " The following morning at the rally, the politician said, "By the political mandate and power you will give to me through the ballot paper I will deliver all of us to the promised land." So I asked myself what promised land are these two individuals talking about? Yet different characters and different contexts promise the same thing. So whose promised land were we being delivered into? When all of this propaganda about the Promised Land was being communicated to us I was sitting next to three different individuals whom I knew well. Paul, Phil and Patience. I was sure they had their vision of the promised land they wanted to be delivered to. Different from mine, the preacher, the politician and any other individual or sect out there. On the aspect of sects, these sects were formed by differe